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Dragon Ball: The Movie (The Legend of Shen Long)

 In Dragon Ball: The Legend of Shen Long, (the first of roughly 600 Dragon Ball/Z/GT movies) the once kindly King Gurumes has been cursed by the (cleverly named) Rich Stones (Blood Rubies if you're watching the dub, or Blood Diamonds if you're an African)... cursed with insatiable hunger, only cured by eating something more delicious than he has ever tasted. How do you get something so delicious? Well, you send your Mercenaries (Bongo and Pasta) to find the seven dragon balls, in exchange for Rich Stones. But someone else is already after the magical balls...

That's right, these two chuckleheads.

Goku and Bulma meet in this movie much the same way they meet in the original story: Bulma runs Goku over, then decides to shoot him when he retaliates. Seriously, what a bitch. Of course, bullets are no match for Goku, and once Bulma explains that she's a girl, and that someone might be after Goku's dragon ball (Bongo and Pasta, natch), the two join forces and rush to Goku's house.

Bongopasta aren't unreasonable, however. After snatching Goku's ball, they leave a shiny Gurumes coin in its place! Bongo wonders to Pasta whether or not they should be hunting dragon balls instead, but is assured that Rich Stones are more valuable (well duh, rich is right in their name). That's when Bulma and Goku tail their jet in Bulma's own Hoi Poi Capsule jet. Pasta remarks how greedy they are, and Goku shouts that he wants to return their coin to them. This results in a jet-on-jet dog fight, that ends with Bongstas' dragon radar getting destroyed, and Goku and Bulma being shot out of the air. Goku quickly rescues Bulma with some Nyoibo work... and Bulma pees herself.

Out in the wilderness, a girl from Gurumes' country named Pansy is traveling to the southern islands to find the legendary Kame Sen'nin... so that he may save her country from Gurumes' tyranny. Unfortunately for her, she runs into Oolong (in his giant Oni form), who tells her to marry him. Luckily for her, she then runs into Goku, who scares Oolong into becoming his iconic soup-wielding robo form... then into a bat so he can escape Goku. Again, with quick Nyoibo work he takes Oolong down, and right into the territory of the desert bandit himself.

"You two want to visit heaven that badly?"

Oolong decides he's Goku's friend (and fight manager), when Yamcha and Puar come asking for money and capsules. Though Goku is hungry, he agrees to fight Yamcha, and what follows is one of the most well-animated fight scenes this blogger has ever seen (seriously, pick up the 2010 release of this movie, it is sexy)...!

Rogafufuken vs Janken: the movie

Before Yamcha can retaliate from Goku's deadly Janken combo, Bulma shows up and reveals Yamcha greatest weakness - bewbs. So Yamcha and Puar make a strategic retreat, and Goku, Bulma, Oolong, and Pansy max and relax inside of Oolong's camper... Pansy tells them about King Gurumes' curse, his hunt for the dragon balls, and her personal quest to find Kame Sen'nin

Yamcha gets a clever scheme to rush ahead of them and convince Kame Sen'nin to defeat Goku for him, while securing the dragon balls for himself (to wish away his shyness, natch). It almost worked, except... Muten Roshi decides to test Goku's heart by making him step on the Kinto Un... which Goku passes... and Yamcha, once again, makes a strategic retreat.

Roshi is one happening dude.

That's when Bulma discovers Roshi has a dragon ball, and asks to take it for herself. Roshi has no problem, but in exchange, he wants something for himself...

Allow me to present to you the following scene in its entirety, 
as performed by the FUNimation (DBZKai) cast.

After some Pafu Pafu, Kame House is attacked by Bongo and Pasta, seeking Bulma's two dragon balls (and the last two Gurumes needs). They manage to blow up the little modern home, but oh boy... do they pay for it...!


Bongo and Pasta barely escape with their lives... but still manage to steal one dragon ball, and take it back to Gurumes. Goku decides he wants to do the kamehameha, so he does, and Roshi, impressed, tells Pansy she doesn't need him to save her country - that Goku and his friends will be enough. So they're off to King Gurumes...!!

Bongo (on a really awesome hover-board) and Goku square off above the castle, while Bulma gets in another dog fight with ... all of Gurumes' military. Well, save for the ones fighting Yamcha...! Yamcha finds himself, and Puar, cornered when they run into Bulma, Oolong, and Pansy (freshly shot down)... and Pasta on the other side. Yamcha attempts to fight Pasta, but when he accidentally punches her boob, well...

In classic Yamcha style, he gets knocked the fuck out.

It all comes down to the final battle, when Bongo is stepped on by rapidly expanding King Gurumes' (with six dragon balls inside of him, and the curse reaching its limit), and Goku (with the whole DB Crew + Pansy behind him)... a beastly King and a Kamehameha.

But the Kamehameha is all but ineffective to the massively expanding cursed King! Bulma, being ultimately more useful than in perhaps the entire Pilaf Saga, reaches into her bag and tosses her dragon ball into the King's gullet... and calls for Shen Long!


Pansy wishes for her country to be returned to normal, and for the removal of the Rich Stones (remember those?) and Shen Long obliges. Yamcha and Bulma hook up, Puar is happy, Oolong is irritated, and the country rejoices in their lands' return to unpilferdness. Gurumes is returned to normal, but still so hungry... so Pansy gives him an apple. Gurumes eats it and describes it as the greatest thing he'd ever eaten... and it's just an ordinary apple.

So there it is, kids. Eats your fruits and vegetables, or you'll become a power hungry monarch.

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